As much as I am ready to make my resolutions, I vowed to let December be for reflections only, so I am waiting 24 more hours before I piece together my resolutions for 2012 and focusing for one more day on the things I feel are worth remembering. Every year I think we all learn some valuable lessons, and there is only one way to avoid being taught the same thing over and over, and that is to heed what you’ve learned. I learned some monumental lessons this year. Unfortunately for me, some of these themes had introduced themselves before, but 2011 came, and I finally got it! That leaves room in 2012 for some brand new wisdom to come my way. Here’s what I’ve gotten through my thick head so far….
The missing socks never come back. It doesn’t really matter where they escaped to, they never come back.
It’s impossible to please everyone. No matter how hard you try, how much you believe your heart to be in the right place, someone is going to mistake your intentions and be down right pissed off at you. Since you can’t make everyone happy, put yourself at the top of the list of people to please. Seriously! Who do you spend the most time with? Who do you have the most conversations with? You may stop and say “hey, I don’t talk to myself that much!” Yes you do! We all do. When Blondie was a toddler, she used to be quite amused when she would catch my lips moving during some internal dialogue I was hosting in my head. Although I’ve learned to control the lip service, I still mull things over in my brain 20 hours a day, so in 2012, I am going to give myself more reasons to be proud of the choices I’ve made and the words I’ve said to others, and I am not going to let someone else’s happiness over power my own! I am the master of my own domain, as it should have been all along.
Sometimes cars break down, bills are late, children cry, and the grass dies. These are not emergencies. Do not give them emergency status in your thoughts. Simply make a plan. You can fix the car, pay the bill, wipe the tears and water the grass, even if you think its impossible, you will find a way to do it! You just need a little faith and effort… old-fashioned elbow grease works every time!
And speaking of vehicles, Fix the car before you replace it. Fix it a dozen times if you have to. I guarantee you that nothing they made this year, nothing they are making next year will hold a candle to what you already have. Upgrading is great, but not always necessary. The hardest pill I swallowed this year was getting rid of the brand new black shiny Dodge Grand Caravan my husband bought me a few years ago. The payment ate up too much of the budget and having extra kids meant we needed extra cash. Through a series of horse trades, we ended up with the 2001 Yukon my parents bought years ago. It spent some time serving as my sister’s mode of transportation. It came to me well-worn and now proudly boasts 200,000 miles. Not once have I yelled because the plastic moldings were popping off or the sliding doors were going crazy. When you pay out the wazoo to drive some nice fancy car, it will eat you up inside to see the lack of craftsmanship cars hold these days. They fall apart as soon as you get the contracts signed. The only good thing they come with is a loud enough radio to drown out the sound of your investment crumbling. My Yukon is a decade older, but still bright red and comfortable, and runs like a champion. I don’t fall apart when a child gets mud on the floor board or crumbs on the seats. I am hoping and praying I make it through several more years with my Yukon, and if I have to, I will rebuild her! She’s a gorgeous old thing, and I kind of think trading her in would be like my husband trading me in! She may have a lot of miles, but she’s still a nice ride! No sense in replacing her now, we’ve made memories together! But I may buy her a new radio… nothing wrong with some new accessories!
Be yourself. Sing loud in the car, dance crazy on the living room floor, wear socks when your feet are cold, and never feel the need to mask who you really are in hopes of making someone like you. They either do, or they don’t. If they don’t, you don’t have to fix it. It’s ok if not everyone likes you. You don’t like everyone… you know you don’t. It only stings when someone you did like didn’t reciprocate. It is what it is… accept it and move on. Don’t analyze it to death pouting about “what did I do?” It doesn’t matter, so get over it. Now if some of these people happen to be family, well then my friend, you may be stuck with them… but you don’t have to put on a mask and try to make nice… just make peace. Sometimes Peace can take a path to Like, but it’s a long, slow-traveled road that must get through Respect first, so just sit back, relax, and wait…
Dream! Day dream as often as you can, it makes the night dreams more interesting. Last night I dreamed my great-grandmother, Mama Jimmie was here to visit me and my sister. The three of us were in a small room, and she was wearing the velour jogging suit I remember her sometimes wearing before her stroke. She was telling us how proud she was of both of us for the choices we recently made. And then, she wanted to know if we could dye her hair… you see in Heaven it had started to grow out a gorgeous shade of reddish-brown, but the ends were still gray from her days here on Earth… Of course we just happened to have some dye on hand, funny how dreams work that way, and we obliged her at once. I guess even in Heaven a new hair color can lift your spirits. So, go ahead, buy that box of Garnier Fructis you keep eyeballing in Wal-Mart… I bet that shade is just perfect on you!
Last, but not least, be silly! I think this is the one that has kept my grandpa (whom I called Softy) on my mind so much lately. He was always and forever silly. When the kids really get under my skin, and I feel like any second an atomic bomb is going to detonate in my brain, I randomly pick a child and tickle them until they are gasping for air. I then allow them to take revenge on me until the atomic bomb has turned into a cloud of giggles. It’s by far the best lesson I have ever resurrected. I used to live by this idea, but somehow I lost my way for a little while. The Zoo Crew brought me back to life, but you don’t need 7 kids to make this idea work. All you need to do is look in the mirror, find your silliest face, and use it whenever a case of the grumpies comes chasing you. My grandpa used to tell me “what’s the difference And/Or a motorcycle?” And his answer baffles me still… “Oranges, because fences don’t have sleeves.”
Those are the most random, silly words I have ever heard. I challenge you to create your own random nonsensical riddle and start saying it all the time to your kids, grandkids, co-workers, friends, WHO EVER YOU TALK TO! Make them look at you with a confused expression until laughter busts forth…
You can thank me for that one later… Now its 1am and I hear my pillow calling out to me, unable to dream until I lay my head upon it.
Goodnight bloggers, sweet reflections on this, our last day of 2011!