Now where were we?


Routine is slowly retuning to my life! The kids are back in school. The house is undecorated. I spent two days cleaning the house from their weeks of winter break! By Wednesday I texted my mother and said “I may be in the Twilight Zone! The laundry is done, the dishes are done, and the house is clean!” So she responded: “Look under the beds.”  Yep, leave it to my mom to remind me of just exactly where the messes must be hiding.  Oh well, at least the part I can see looked good. I even finished tiling and grouting my back splash.

I’ve only been waiting for about 7 months for the hubby to help me finish the remodel of our kitchen. Finally I took matters into my own hands! I must say, I’m pretty impressed with myself. I even learned how to use the wet saw. But it never fails, as soon as I get things together, this family takes them all apart.

Take Thursday night, for example. I sent Blondie to get some hamburger meat out of the freezer so I could cook Stroganoff. Now I don’t know if Daddy didn’t mark things clearly or if Blondie didn’t read it right, but whatever it was, I didn’t catch the mistake when I opened the meat and fried it up. Once everyone started eating, kids were exclaiming “this is spicy!” Stroganoff? Spricy? That can’t be. Then we figured it out. Blondie mistook a package of hot sausage for a package of hamburger and there it was, our first batch of spicy stroganoff. Hey, what’s life without the small hiccups, right?

Then Friday morning we added a few more hiccups to our week when Jayden lost his new shoes. Now, my kids are famous for losing their shoes. I have resorted to giving each of them a basket, with their name on it, to put all of their shoes in. This basket is accompanied by daily reminders to “put your shoes in the basket”.  I tell them several times a day to put their shoes away and yet it never fails, morning will come, we’ll be ready to go and there will be a child without shoes, and typically it’s one of my twins who seems unable to cover his feet.

If only they wouldn't lose their shoes!

If only they wouldn’t lose their shoes!

It took everyone in the house searching for shoes to finally find a pair that would do (even though Christmas brought them all two pairs of shoes, and with a twin that should mean there are potentially 4 or 5 pairs to choose from). I turn around and my 6 year old is still jumping up and down shirtless. Did I mention he brings hyper-active to a whole new level? Then I learn my 13 year old needs assistance drawing George Washington for a project due that day, and my four year old can’t go to school until I put her babies down for a nap so by the time I get everyone squared away we are, of course, running late!

Meet Vanessa! She sleeps in Mommy's bed when we head to school each day!

Meet Vanessa! She sleeps in Mommy’s bed when we head to school each day!

I was doing my best to remain calm and patient, but when my favorite boys in blue pulled me over for going 23 in a 20, I lost it. This kid was obviously the rookie, he doesn’t look a year older than Blondie, and maybe he didn’t even know that his colleagues have ruined my day many times, but when he actually uttered “I’m pulling you over because I clocked you at 23 in a 20” I actually said, with my meanest MAD MOMMY EYES, “you’re kidding me, right?!”

I was right outside the high school. I had 3 minutes to make it inside before the bell, and he wanted to stop me for that? I wasn’t even stepping on the gas pedal in the school zone. I always just coast. But for some reason, (that is well documented in this blog) I seem to attract the boys in blue. I’d blame it on my fire engine red Yukon, but she’s been parked. She needs major surgery. Her transmission requires a transplant. I should be blending right in with my green suburban, but still, it’s me they love to escort to the side of the road. Maybe I just give off that vibe that says “You wanna lean in my window and ask for my signature!”

Lucky me, this time I drove away with merely a warning, but while everyone else is busy saying TGIF, I was walking around work, knowing the weekend would bring with it a hundred more hiccups for me to enjoy. Should I say “enjoy”, is that really the word I’m searching for? Oh well, let’s just go with it…


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