Even in her dreams…


So my Blondie is truly blonde. It wouldn’t matter if her hair were jet black, she can’t escape her blondness. Not even in her dreams. The other night she took NyQuil for a head cold and when she woke up she said it gave her nightmares. She was telling me about this dream where she and a friend of hers had been abandoned by their boyfriends in this old rickety house. Suddenly some robber/rapists were pounding on the door and shouting “we know you’re in there.” What did Blondie do? She hollered “No, we’re not!!” Even in her sleep, she’s a blonde.

If this summer of sickness has taught us anything, it’s that Blondie doesn’t do well with medications of any kind. In the hospital when they gave her morphine, she thought she had fleas! She jumped up on the bed and starting scratching like crazy with a hair brush. I told her right then and there, “it’s time to become a  health fanatic, cuz you will never do well with visiting the doctor’s office on a regular basis!” I can’t imagine her as an old lady with a bucket of prescriptions she has to take every morning. She’d probably turn into the white version of Madea with hot pink hair and go driving around crashing into Taco Bell’s every time they didn’t fold her burrito right. She’s also broken up with her boyfriend about a dozen times, pretty much every time she was given any kind of pain medicine. Poor boy should learn by now that if she breaks out the cough syrup he better lay low for a few days.

I have to say, I hope my years of being a granny are still in the distant future, but when they do come, I certainly have an arsenal of stories to offer up to my little grand-kids about their mommy and all her clever (or not-so-clever) antics. Like the other night, she was playing a gig at this amazing little restaurant called “The French Quarter” and as most singer/songwriters do, she was telling stories in between the songs. She was about to sing “Everybody Dies Famous in a Small Town” by Miranda Lambert. I thought she might share that she learned that song in junior high. She once sang it a pep rally and all the cheerleaders did a little pom-pom dance while she sang. I remember being so proud of her that day! Instead, she talked about her grandfather, who is battling cancer, and in true Blondie fashion she said “the only guarantee in life is that we’re all gonna die eventually, and you’ll either be in a big city, or a small town!” I cracked up laughing. Something about the expression on her face just made the moment. I guess if that’s the philosophy, might as well die famous in a small town…

Blondie at the French Quarter

Blondie at the French Quarter


6 responses »

  1. 🙂 I wish her well, Tiffany. I was really surprised about the nightmares though – never heard of such a reaction. Dreadful.

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