Resolutions Refused!


Last night the hubby did invite me out to a little party, and I’m sure it would have been fun, but I wasn’t up for any fun. I’ve spent the past the past two weeks being sick or taking care of sick kids and last night, all I wanted to do to ring in the new year was close my eyes and go to sleep.

There have been a lot of changes around here lately. Blondie started her new journey and I started a new assignment at work. It’s temporary, but it’s kept me very busy for the past few weeks. I’ve never loved a job as much as I am loving this one. I am teaching one student in an alternative classroom setting, and it’s been both really challenging and really rewarding. The more this kid opens up to me, the more inspired I am to reach out to him. He has shown me so clearly the path that my children could have ended up on had I not adopted them. He is so intelligent, and every time I see him reach a goal, I am inspired to come home and work harder with my own kids. It’s even made me wonder what it would be like to home school my kids, but I’m not ready to go that crazy just yet.There’s something I love about being a part of the public school system. I love Friday night football games and wearing Tiger T’Shirts and cheering on all the kids in town. Children gain so much from learning alongside other kids their own age. But sitting in my classroom the past few weeks I have realized how many unwanted lessons kids pass around. Kids shouldn’t attach their personal worth to the brand of their tennis shoes or the game system in their living room, but so many of them are doing just that.

If I could change just one thing for the kids in this town, I’d teach them all that under the Nike’s and Xbox games, they’re really all the same. They all come from this little town, and they all struggle, and they are all blessed in different ways. They spend so much time looking for what makes them better than one another, instead of holding on to their common threads. They all have gifts and talents that make them far more worthy than a pair of Abercrombie jeans.  All they need to do is look inside themselves until the gifts start to shine through.

I think my gift has become a little more clear to me the past few weeks. I have a knack for getting through to the kids other people might not reach. I have a gift for seeing the light inside them. So this year, instead of some dumb resolution where I vow to lose twenty pounds I’m sure to find again, I think I’m going to focus on something a little more important. I’m going to make it my goal to finish my classes and get my teaching license so that I can go on looking for the lights…

There is nothing like working with a child that appreciates the opportunity to learn. There is nothing like seeing the difference you’ve made in who a child is capable of becoming. There is nothing as sweet as the moment when you’ve pushed them to challenge themselves, when you didn’t give the answer, you gave the path to find it. Last week a child told me I was the best teacher he’d ever had, and it was the best compliment I’ve ever received. So forget all the empty promises I’ve made to myself over the years. I’m never gonna get the closets all cleaned out. I probably won’t rid my house of all the unnecessary clutter or finish remodeling it either.  I’m never gonna make it to size 6 jeans. I’m not going to quit biting my nails, cut all the sugar out of my diet, or make jogging a part of my daily life. I refuse to waste my time this year on resolutions that won’t make it to February. Instead, I’m going to make myself one promise, and one promise only…

I’m going to teach. Whether it be at my kitchen table with my children gathered round, or in the little classroom I sit in every day, I’m going to look inside every child I come across until I find the light, and then I’m going to help them learn to let it shine. That’s exactly what I’m going to do with this gift of mine…

This year, I will use my gifts...

This year, I will use my gifts…



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