You’re Not Getting Away With That!


I’m amazed my kids haven’t figured out that I’m going to catch on to almost everything they try to get away with. Sometimes I think they try harder to slide one by me than it would take to just mind me. Last week I sent Trenton to take a shower. He came out of the bathroom so fast, I knew he didn’t bathe, so I sent him back. This time he turned on the shower on for a few minutes, but still he came back with the same smudge on his cheek, and again I sent him to the bathroom. You would think he’d give in and rinse off a layer of dirt, but no, he ran the shower, splashed a little water on his hair, and tried once again to return to the spot he warmed on the couch. This time, I marched him back to the bathroom, watched as he reluctantly stepped into the shower, and while he got out the soap I gave him the speech about how nobody wants to sit next to the stinky boy in school. Then he actually told me he wants to be the stinky boy… well, he’s off to a good start.

I’m not sure which is worse, the stinky boy or the clever kid. Tucker spends all his time trying to outsmart the rest of us, and most of the time he comes pretty close. This kid keeps me on my A-game. A few weeks ago we’re walking through Walmart. Memaw and Poppa had given out twenty dollar bills at Christmas and I held them until the after-Christmas sales were going strong. Suddenly. Tucker had enough money to buy a brand new Playstation 4 game, and if you’ve bought many of these games, you know $60 is a low end starting point. Ridiculously over-priced if you ask me, but no one really asks me! However, I did ask Tucker how he went from $20 to $65 in the time it took us to go from our house to Wal-Mart and I was appalled at the answer. He had convinced his brothers to take one twenty dollar bill and buy a bunch of little toys to play with. He took the other two twenties for his video game, which they would be allowed to play. ONCE. These little kids look up to him so much, they were willing to pay $40 for the opportunity to observe Tucker playing the game with a bonus of one turn for themselves. It would have been a genius move if MOM hadn’t intercepted his plans!! Sadly, when I tried talking to the younger kids about not being duped, they were convinced that they would have made an excellent purchase with Tucker. If this were a text message, this is exactly where I’d type SMH (shaking my head), because that’s exactly what I do half the time.

This morning was no exception. I heard my twins in an argument. “You didn’t do my homework!” Jordan was pretty animated as he shook his paper at Jayden, who nonchalantly answered “I didn’t do mine either!” So I immediately interfered with my eyebrows narrowed down at them. “He doesn’t do your homework Jordan!”

“But I gave him a dollar!” Jordan explain and then Jayden validated “Yeah, he gave me a dollar!” So I tried to explain, “you can’t pay someone to do your homework, then you don’t learn what you needed to learn.” And of course, he was quick to point out that he had learned how to get his homework done!

I guess they’ve given up on accidentally losing their folders on the bus or burying their backpacks in the backyard or dropping books into the bathtub and opted to pay someone to finish it instead. Maybe that’s better than the time I caught them feeding reading logs to Hercules…

Poor Hercules, he thought that reading log would taste more like chicken!!

Poor Hercules, he thought that reading log would taste more like chicken!!

***************************  #9  **********************************


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